Day 2

Day 2

Inspiration: 

33 Days to Morning Glory, Michael Gaitley

“We had hoped to build a Calvary here. Let us build it in our hearts. Blessed be God.” 

The fruits of our daily labor are not always what we imagine them to be. Am I prepared for this truth? We may work day in and day out with a preconceived notion of what these sacrifices might yield. We do so with good intention. We feel the Lord’s presence in all that we do. Yet, am I detached enough? God at any time can close up shop. He can shut the door. He can silence all. And if he does, do I trust in the greater good that I can not see?

This lesson was most evident in my life when my husband and  I faced the unexpected news that we would most likely not have children…that a hysterectomy was the best outcome to protect my health. I remember crying through Baptisms at church and expressing my guilt, fears and anger privately to my Pastor. In prayer I began to accept that God might have different “greater purpose” for me and I slowly began to accept the peace in my heart that I could live that out whatever it was in a noble way. Yet, I continued to seek second opinions, which lead to alternative treatment plans at U of M Cancer Treatment Center, then this teeny tiny window of time we could try to conceive in after 4 consecutive healthy biopsies. My husband and I had no time to question, doubt, or wait to think about what we wanted or what was practical. It was now or never,  and we completely submitted ourselves to Him. 

Paul John Martindale was conceived on the same day I saw the Golden Host during a mass said for Administrators  by Reverend Steve Mattson at St. Mary’s Cathedral in Lansing, Michigan. He was born November 19, 2012. Henry Jude followed 23 months later on October 2, 2014.